We won't sleep together?
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
Randomize
