My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
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