Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
It's not a walk of shame if you run
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
Randomize
