Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
Randomize
