Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
