he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
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