If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
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