i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Randomize
