Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
Randomize
