The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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