He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
