I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Randomize
