After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
