so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
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