Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Randomize