ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
