I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
She even gives head with a lisp.
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
