when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize
