Christians are straight up FREAKS
You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Randomize
