maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
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