That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
