dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
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