i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
