you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Randomize
