im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize
