Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
