fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
My butt remains clenched, sir.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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