Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
The only dream I remember having is one where my dad's sperm turned into baby hippos. Like, tiny baby hippos, pocket-sized. I am so fucked up.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
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