I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
