the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
