we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize
