I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
Princesses don't give blow jobs
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
