Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize