How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
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