I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
