This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
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