Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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