He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
A+ Viking dick
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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