just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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