I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
