how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
Randomize
