I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
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