Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
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