What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
