Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
Randomize
