she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
Randomize
