aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
