New invention idea: vibrating tampons
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
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