Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
