so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
Randomize