the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
Randomize
