I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
Randomize
